the kitchen things…!

How I cherish my good old self who was obsessed with gadgets of almost every type. As bachelor I always thought of having well equipped kitchen whenever I will have my own. I am no pro at cooking nor do I plan to be the one, in short I am not keen in trying and experimenting recipes…! Irrespective of the just mentioned fact, I wanted every available appliance at my disposal.

Not that whatever I dreamt of is reality, but I am in process of reaching where I wanted ;). So far yours truly has got three different types of mixers/grinder (yeah 3 thanks to Mr G for his contribution to bring the numbers up 😉 ) , a griller, microwave oven and a blender to be precise 😉 .

Past two years of lockdown has opened up new feathers of my better half’s personality to me, I find him equally excited while roaming in the utensils shop as me, yeah you are reading it right :D. My affection for him is increased by an inch for this :p . So with this common found interest, we managed to shift from semi to fully automatic washing machine. We planned and have a microwave we are in the process of doing some research for the dishwasher and air fryer.

A few of whatever I have so far are not very regularly used, but let me tell ya, they are my priced possession. The thought of having it all is so damn satisfying, crazy you see 😀 . I haven’t had a recollection of having this draft laying around, now that I noticed it, hitting the button to move it up from drafts…

Disclaimer: please try your best not to find a logical start/middle/end to this post..

dictatorship in disguise…

Support is the sugar coated covering under the wrappers of which lies dictatorship.

It may sound exaggeration, but how is one supposed to take it if dictated for every single so-called decision, even the ones which are just not one’s cup of tea.

How to raise your child, what work location you should choose while you search for new opportunities, how many number of children you should have? When you should have them, what should be the age difference between your two children if you plan for so , when you should visit your parents/sibling , what places you should go both and what not and the list is never ending, argh ….!

I wonder if it’s just me who’s mind replay the entire past years of me getting into a new house and being adjusted, having a baby and then taking care of her ( not sure of the intent of though ) before I give a befitting reply. Do I really need to be obliged so much that I entirely surrender all my life to someone else? Somehow all that I contributed is gone for toss and vanished in the blue sky. The biggest lesson to be learnt here for me is , no matter if it sounds like boasting, one should keep repting the same tape of good things done. That’s the only way forward be it personal or professional life. It is all out of sight/ears out of mind theory.

All this is none less than wake call for me to take good control of everything and do what I feel like doing. I always appreciate and will be grateful for all good that is done to me and try my best to return the favour but certainly not at the cost of my life’s decisions. And that happens to the expectation, I will find a way to move forward without such favors. Wish me strength…!

It’s me,

Yours truly

pillars…

There are people who turn up anytime and everytime you need them around leaving you in awe for their timing, presence and every other possible thing.

I wonder what are they made of. What one needs to feed for a relationship to be so rock solid that you can count on someone more than your self. These people are not different than backstage heros without whom the show simply cannot run. One may not see them for sunny days, but if they sense clouds hovering over you , turn around to find them standing by you.

One has to build this a day at time for sure and one has to be importantly lucky to see the tree bearing fruits for all the efforts taken knowingly and unknowingly.

I am happy to see these strong pillars standing by you Mr husband. May you be blessed with them for rest of life. Amen…!

Identity and individuality…!

Does it make sense to respond on behalf of a gender group because the group it self is being criticised to a level not acceptable because of some rotten apples?

I felt wave of anguish for all girls/ women addressed with the worst words I could tolerate and aptly gave it back then and there. I have a realisation for the prejudices and biases against the feminine gender and I thought I have moved on from it once and for all. It was utterly down to the level that I couldn’t simply let it pass.

I just wonder what kind of mindset it is to completely overlook that is wrong under our own feets and do a full throttle effort to pin point entire world so badly that our wrong is buried deep down for anyone to see.

Nothing and no one is perfect, why we just cannot live and let live ? Why we have to peep into others lives and have a say or suggestions which are not asked for? What kind of achievement one leads to by proving others wrong and down.

I need a break from every damn thing around. I need a patience and energy to look at good over evil, get past all that is not appropriate. Amen…..!

emotional turbulence…!

Things happen and end up stirring every corner of your the mind leaving you with nothing more than a dismay.

Life brings you up to everything that you didn’t think of in your wildest dream and leaves you wondering does it even really make sense to plan/imagine the things. In reality we as human don’t have even a percent of control over any thing that is happening around.

People turn around, left and right, up and down with blink of eye. The ones you counted on to be your core seem to be part of different world without you realising that move. Each of your move judged and counted as foul no matter how unintentionally it happens.

Nothing is pure. All your actions are labelled and interpreted in possible ways except for your thought process behind it.

Take on what life throws…!

it’s ok not to be ok…

Apparently as the title suggests it’s not ok. I am either pissed off or scared or just not fine with probably anything.

I am heck tired of falling sick every other day. I feel so drained emotionally that I cannot even comfort my own self, forget about others. I am at loss of words for conversation to him, oh my what can be more dreadful. I wonder if my 30s hormones are doing the trick or I have deficiency of all those vital amines. What ever it is , it is not letting me to be me. At times I am at the tip of outburst and I feel nothing at the other. As weird as it may sound I feel trapped.

There are two people in the world whom I can talk to without being judged or all my secrets are safe with them. One of them is again so don’t like to trouble her every now and then, but the other? I and only I have all rights in the world to trouble him, but sigh , I keep thinking and thinking without uttering a word….! I swear it isn’t deliberately done, but it is happening no matter how much I hate it.

I simply cannot concentrate. There are 100 things running on my mind at any given point of time. I am not reading, not working to best of my capacity , not writing either. I don’t workout, even the stroll or evening walks rare these days, stuck between the corners of the house. I never imagined this can cause nuisance to me.

I just need some fresh air , a good book to read and inline blog post about what I liked in it.

https://youtu.be/SXGMWuJZeeo

Feeling like a drop in the ocean
That don’t nobody notice
Maybe it’s all just in your head
Feeling like you’re trapped in your own skin
And now your body’s frozen
Broken down, you’ve got nothing left

When you’re high on emotion
And you’re losing your focus
And you feel too exhausted to pray
Don’t get lost in the moment
Or give up when you’re closest
All you need is somebody to say

It’s okay not to be okay
It’s okay not to be okay
When you’re down and you feel ashamed
It’s okay not to be okay

Feeling like your life’s an illusion
And lately, you’re secluded
Thinking you’ll never get your chance
Feeling like you got no solution
It’s only ’cause you’re human
No control, it’s out of your hands

When you’re high on emotion
And you’re losing your focus
And you feel too exhausted to pray
Don’t get lost in the moment
Or give up when you’re closest
All you need is somebody to say

It’s okay not to be okay
It’s okay not to be okay
When you’re down and you feel ashamed
It’s okay not to be okay

When you’re high on emotion
And you’re losing your focus
And you feel too exhausted to pray
Don’t get lost in the moment
Or give up when you’re closest
All you need is somebody to say

It’s okay not to be okay (ohh)
It’s okay not to be okay (no, no, no)
When you’re down and you feel ashamed
(When you feel ashamed)
It’s okay not to be okay (no, no)
It’s okay not to be okaySource: LyricFind

it takes time…!

This is the realisation all around me for quite some time now. It is syncing in profoundly with each thought crossing my mind, with each tangled thread I am trying to untangle as swiftly as I can.

We had wonderfull “us” time while we were on the road driving that long after significant time. It was just us and we could touch base n number of things we did, we are doing and we will be doing. I feel I must have grown atleast some inches wiser if we could count wisdom with this measure. Yes his talking does this to me and generally this happens over a drive way to a dinner and across the table there. Thanks to covid now that dinning out or going anywhere out casually is distant dream.

Not that I or we have concrete plans for everything for day to day things of for the future that they say, but some things are done and dusted. Vision for some blurry things is clear now. I clearly know what I shouldn’t indulge myself in and now I am able to make boundaries around me for the same. Hopefully I won’t let the same things weigh me down any more.

This evolving wouldn’t have happened over night no matter how calm and matured and understanding we were even 7 years back. It takes time to learn to let go. It takes time to move on. It takes time stop bothering about certain things. It takes time to heal. It takes time to grow wise and make peace with whatever you have and wherever you are…..!

It took time for us too to have each other… ❤️

N.B. : little out of context tough, did I mention yours truly still flatters on hearing she is loved for what she is…! 😘❤️

Signing off….

It’s me,

Yours truly 🙂

Daily Prompt: I Walk the Line

Have you got a code you live by? What are the principles or set of values you actively apply in your life?

——————————————————————————————-

Yes, yours truly walks the line. I have my very own concepts of rights and wrongs, and I abide those set of lines no matter what..!To list a few, this is what I follow..

1) Promises are to keep.

2)Be good to others, but don’t waste time proving it.

3)Commitments are meant to met, be it be personal/professional life.

4)If you think you can show me bad for no reason, I wont mind showing the worst for the same reason..! (yeah I mean it when I say it)

5)Stand for the right things no matter what..

6)Once decided, its engraved.

7)Being punctual is mandate.

Well these are a few those popped up whilst I was reading the daily prompt. I need to compile detailed list and my be post it here sometime later.. 🙂