the kitchen things…!

How I cherish my good old self who was obsessed with gadgets of almost every type. As bachelor I always thought of having well equipped kitchen whenever I will have my own. I am no pro at cooking nor do I plan to be the one, in short I am not keen in trying and experimenting recipes…! Irrespective of the just mentioned fact, I wanted every available appliance at my disposal.

Not that whatever I dreamt of is reality, but I am in process of reaching where I wanted ;). So far yours truly has got three different types of mixers/grinder (yeah 3 thanks to Mr G for his contribution to bring the numbers up 😉 ) , a griller, microwave oven and a blender to be precise 😉 .

Past two years of lockdown has opened up new feathers of my better half’s personality to me, I find him equally excited while roaming in the utensils shop as me, yeah you are reading it right :D. My affection for him is increased by an inch for this :p . So with this common found interest, we managed to shift from semi to fully automatic washing machine. We planned and have a microwave we are in the process of doing some research for the dishwasher and air fryer.

A few of whatever I have so far are not very regularly used, but let me tell ya, they are my priced possession. The thought of having it all is so damn satisfying, crazy you see 😀 . I haven’t had a recollection of having this draft laying around, now that I noticed it, hitting the button to move it up from drafts…

Disclaimer: please try your best not to find a logical start/middle/end to this post..

dictatorship in disguise…

Support is the sugar coated covering under the wrappers of which lies dictatorship.

It may sound exaggeration, but how is one supposed to take it if dictated for every single so-called decision, even the ones which are just not one’s cup of tea.

How to raise your child, what work location you should choose while you search for new opportunities, how many number of children you should have? When you should have them, what should be the age difference between your two children if you plan for so , when you should visit your parents/sibling , what places you should go both and what not and the list is never ending, argh ….!

I wonder if it’s just me who’s mind replay the entire past years of me getting into a new house and being adjusted, having a baby and then taking care of her ( not sure of the intent of though ) before I give a befitting reply. Do I really need to be obliged so much that I entirely surrender all my life to someone else? Somehow all that I contributed is gone for toss and vanished in the blue sky. The biggest lesson to be learnt here for me is , no matter if it sounds like boasting, one should keep repting the same tape of good things done. That’s the only way forward be it personal or professional life. It is all out of sight/ears out of mind theory.

All this is none less than wake call for me to take good control of everything and do what I feel like doing. I always appreciate and will be grateful for all good that is done to me and try my best to return the favour but certainly not at the cost of my life’s decisions. And that happens to the expectation, I will find a way to move forward without such favors. Wish me strength…!

It’s me,

Yours truly

get your sanity back

Wise man said , they bring you down to their level and beat you with experience. How long one can refrain from getting down to that level so that person on the other end can have taste of their own behavioral pattern. What is means by which a mirror can be shown to make some one understand act of belittling is heat wrenching. I am on the verge of giving up on the sane behavior just get there and give it right back. At times no other way can bring that realization but being exactly there on receiving end.

This is all at the cost of my own sanity as this is not real me. This leaves me in awe for how insanely difficult it is to be your self and barely live as you are. All the virtues of being empathetic and sensitive to other individuals are something to be kept on shelf and not to be practiced in every day life. All that counts is how impactfully you can bring someone down to prove your self superior. If thigs are down south for some part of your life, someone else is responsible for that and the prosperity is because you being that supreme self…! arrgh…! 😠

This is getting really crazy here for my soul, as I cannot get over for the deeds I did which I wouldn’t have otherwise if I would be ME, and if I opt out of doing that, I would have to let enjoy others of how effortlessly they made full of me. I need to get my sanity back and only way forward to that is to be ME. I must opt out for getting into that sick process for letting someone understand the negative impacts of the actions done knowingly/ unknowingly.

“Don’t tell me there’s no place for innocent hearts in this world. Don’t tell me I need to accept what I don’t believe in. I respect it. Don’t confuse my values for my stubbornness, although I am stubborn. Don’t confuse my positive attitude for being naive. Allow me to wrap my heart around you for a moment. Listen to this. Innocent hearts may not belong anywhere in this world but they are big enough for any heart in this world. Innocent hearts belong in innocent hearts. Innocent hearts belong in the hearts of those who genuinely want happiness.”
― Najwa Zebian, Mind Platter

ticked off…

The dream of having a SUV is ticked off of my bucket list once and for all. Well it covers few another points of sublist of having a VW vehicle (yeah yours truly is hopeless brand freak 😉) and that specific colour as well. It may not sound like a deal especially for colour thing, but nothing falls in place stright here. Every choice presented has counter with list of mundane reasons.

I am yet to drive the beast, the size – length and breadth makes me nervous, but surely soon I need to get hands on the wheel. Oh and someone loves that beauty more than he does yours truly, yet another reason for holding back 🙄

We ran errands, knocked door of every possible showroom having options in the segment and I must admit VW was love at first sight. No matter how much weighed the options in terms of all the offering like performance, features and the cost, Taigun had our heart(needless to say, we ended up spending fortune).

It is isn’t just dream come true, it is helping me have that heavenly feeling of having best of everything for the boy..! I still used to see his eyes sparkle while we saw Eco Sports move on the roads. We couldn’t have it for good reason then and by the time we could think of it, it is out the market. I just hope I could cover him , if not with Eco Sports, but something even better.

While we were to welcome a new things with excitement in our hearts, bidding adieu to 1st wasnt easy thing. She will always be cherished and remembered for being a faithful companion. She was the 1st grand thing we did for ourselves.

I hope to follow this post with tale of driving experience. Till then signing off.

It’s me,

yours truly

Identity and individuality…!

Does it make sense to respond on behalf of a gender group because the group it self is being criticised to a level not acceptable because of some rotten apples?

I felt wave of anguish for all girls/ women addressed with the worst words I could tolerate and aptly gave it back then and there. I have a realisation for the prejudices and biases against the feminine gender and I thought I have moved on from it once and for all. It was utterly down to the level that I couldn’t simply let it pass.

I just wonder what kind of mindset it is to completely overlook that is wrong under our own feets and do a full throttle effort to pin point entire world so badly that our wrong is buried deep down for anyone to see.

Nothing and no one is perfect, why we just cannot live and let live ? Why we have to peep into others lives and have a say or suggestions which are not asked for? What kind of achievement one leads to by proving others wrong and down.

I need a break from every damn thing around. I need a patience and energy to look at good over evil, get past all that is not appropriate. Amen…..!

emotional turbulence…!

Things happen and end up stirring every corner of your the mind leaving you with nothing more than a dismay.

Life brings you up to everything that you didn’t think of in your wildest dream and leaves you wondering does it even really make sense to plan/imagine the things. In reality we as human don’t have even a percent of control over any thing that is happening around.

People turn around, left and right, up and down with blink of eye. The ones you counted on to be your core seem to be part of different world without you realising that move. Each of your move judged and counted as foul no matter how unintentionally it happens.

Nothing is pure. All your actions are labelled and interpreted in possible ways except for your thought process behind it.

Take on what life throws…!

To the complete Big 1

Well your mumma almost missed it and is late as always. It was on 29th and that is more than couple of days back. They say better late than never, so here I am.

Wish you a very happy first birthday sweetheart. Love to the moon and back and blessings from all of us. May you be blessed with best of everything you would ever cherish for.

We made sure to keep the celebration as simple as possible as we didn’t wanted to see you cry, feel annoyed and give up on everything. You are too small for all this and we promise the one absolutely the way you want when you yourself can tell us about how you want it to be. We know somewhere that we disappointed many people around doing this, but it was all for you and so we wanted it to be suitable for you and nothing else was even of concern.

Capturing your milestones on the occasion of the D day here :

You can almost walk without any support. I wish I could protect you from the contaminated air and just have a pure thing for you to breath and save you from all those viral things,sigh. It brought you down and made you weak to the core. Hoping for your seepdy recovery.

Oh yes how can we forget about your teething, 1 is clearly out and others have started peeping out. Cannot wait to see you as our cute little bunny with two upper ones out :). I know it is way too painful for you but this is how we all have it, so hang on you are almost there.

You can speak now, yeah the clear words. Most important you gladly call me “Aai” with that cute smile and you know it is a thing to die for. You have no idea how much I have been waiting for this to happen since you started blabbering.

You have started recognising a few animals and fondly try to imitate there voices. I am trying my best to capture and preserve it all.

You are getting addicted to rhymes played on the phone, and I don’t have a clear solution as to how can I make you forget this as I am not around you 24X7. This and such similar things gives me and your papa worries to an extent that we end thinking of quitting the work as solution to put an end to all this mess 😦

Last but not the least you are improving on sleep hours in the night and I can have a sleep for 4 hours straight uninterrupted. This is quite an achievement for both of us , ain’t it 😉

I don’t know for what reason but I am not able to bring this post to an inline end, putting an end with these lines:

My baby

waving a good bye

You opened eyes, so did I,

you smiled and almost said hi…!

Cutenss of your palm and those little fingers,

sparkling eyes ,of what all should I wonder..?

Me cleaning it all and you creating a mess,

You and me only know that we make most out of this haste…!

You saw me dressed and waved a blabbering good bye,

Making my move easy just to see you soon my sweety pai…..! 🙂

clumsy

So here we are at the end of the first week of the new year…! Time is passing by with blink of eye and here I am by stander witnessing it pass by as if it is someone else’s time and life. 😦 

Get up in the morning, hastly finish and leave for the office. Do mundane things and wait for clock to tick 6PM. Leave for home,do the same stuff without change of a thin line and repeat -call it LIFE, Period…!

No matter how hard i am trying to push myself for the baby steps of starting 15 mins early in the morning, big failure it is…!I wonder when did I get this lazy, wasn’t it the same me for whom getting up at any odd hour of the clock was no deal? With this thing in, exercising is turnig to be a distant dream. I really need to loose couple of pounds atleast if not more.

 I downloaded Kindle so that I can get over the feeling of not finding time to buy/read books, book with not even 200 pages is laying in there for month now and I have no wish to complete it. Wasn’t it the same me for whom a night was enough to finish some 100 pages of the book?Where did I loose this will, for what I mean? What did I find worth loosing this so fondly inculcated hobby?Sigh..!

 Same goes with newly subscribed online tech courses, I purchased them so that I can learn on the move, but no i don’t even remember the last time I opened Udyme.This is yet another thing I am just wondering for.Yeah, you got it right, with no action to bring in the change.

Forget new learning and doing things, I tried cleaning up phones playlist so that I can listen what I like and cheer up for a while atleast, hell no, I am not liking a single track on my own playlist. Help ya people, tell me where should I go?

Bottom line :  nothing is turning up yours truly, yeah nowhere is where I am standing. I don’t even feel urge to do something about this dumb phase. Well,what can be more lame than this. 😐 Wait, if you are suggesting me to take a break, i don’t see it coming any soon.

P.S. : To all my besties who can read between the lines, you people exactly know where I am, in dire need of a meet up…