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dreamtheimmpossible

Its all about thats on my mind…….

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time and life

motherhood saga – ode to unsung hero


It was mother’s day couple of days back and so was this post lingering on my mind. Sure it is a blessing and it is much more than that if you have a that one person as your partner of motherhood – of-course in literal sense.

I would not say motherhood is overrated as every moment of it is either a sweet surprise or a new hiccup to get over, but fatherhood is underrated for sure is what I honestly feel. Now that we are at the advent of gender equality, fathers have come far beyond of their role of being mere bread winners and yours truly is fortunate enough to have such a significant other. So for this time, motherhood saga is all about ode to unsung hero of it – a father of 14 months old.

When I reminisce last two years, the time since we knew are going to be parents to the date, every day has been a new adventure and things kept changing to extent of turning my world upside down – only HE being the constant support to rely on. Things have changed for him to in exactly same way and extent if not more and I interrogate – did I bother about it? for the obvious answer. I was/am so occupied handling spilled over things that I tend to look back only when I need a shoulder to lean on – Unfair, I understand and accept that. Motherhood doesn’t turn any one dumb and deaf for the rest of world though it brings you on toes round the clock. Possible reason for this may be that things that appeared on the surface were so calm,subtle and stable that they hardly showed any glimpse of turmoil underneath. I bow down this art of him of keeping the surface calm irrespective of relentless paddling going down there.

As time is progressing, I am realizing that motherhood takes far more than nine moths of carrying and labor. I keep wondering for how and when things changed and started falling in place without me nagging me for any of it. It started right after we were back here – adjusting her here with new predicament, getting up at any odd hour of the night for her formula,bearing with her peeps and poos,sleeping cautiously every minute of night for she may fall off the bed when she started crawling, giving her bath,making her sleep,changing her nappies and clothes, making her hair and now feeding her from your own dish no matter how much mess she creates with both of her hands in the dish.No one is born with capabilities to go swiftly about all this and so it must not have been easy for you either.

This is just to let you know that nothing of it has gone unnoticed though it may not have been reacted to from time to time. You are adored even more than before for this helping hand without being asked for it. I am spell bound to put what it means to have this all. And though you are sharing the responsibilities for motherhood already, it takes a mother to appreciate it 🙂

Wishing all the mothers and helping fathers a very happy Mother’s day..!

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To the complete Big 1


Well your mumma almost missed it and is late as always. It was on 29th and that is more than couple of days back. They say better late than never, so here I am.

Wish you a very happy first birthday sweetheart. Love to the moon and back and blessings from all of us. May you be blessed with best of everything you would ever cherish for.

We made sure to keep the celebration as simple as possible as we didn’t wanted to see you cry, feel annoyed and give up on everything. You are too small for all this and we promise the one absolutely the way you want when you yourself can tell us about how you want it to be. We know somewhere that we disappointed many people around doing this, but it was all for you and so we wanted it to be suitable for you and nothing else was even of concern.

Capturing your milestones on the occasion of the D day here :

You can almost walk without any support. I wish I could protect you from the contaminated air and just have a pure thing for you to breath and save you from all those viral things,sigh. It brought you down and made you weak to the core. Hoping for your seepdy recovery.

Oh yes how can we forget about your teething, 1 is clearly out and others have started peeping out. Cannot wait to see you as our cute little bunny with two upper ones out :). I know it is way too painful for you but this is how we all have it, so hang on you are almost there.

You can speak now, yeah the clear words. Most important you gladly call me “Aai” with that cute smile and you know it is a thing to die for. You have no idea how much I have been waiting for this to happen since you started blabbering.

You have started recognising a few animals and fondly try to imitate there voices. I am trying my best to capture and preserve it all.

You are getting addicted to rhymes played on the phone, and I don’t have a clear solution as to how can I make you forget this as I am not around you 24X7. This and such similar things gives me and your papa worries to an extent that we end thinking of quitting the work as solution to put an end to all this mess 😦

Last but not the least you are improving on sleep hours in the night and I can have a sleep for 4 hours straight uninterrupted. This is quite an achievement for both of us , ain’t it 😉

I don’t know for what reason but I am not able to bring this post to an inline end, putting an end with these lines:

My baby

see you soon…


It is just a few miles that I am away from you, my mind wonders for your where-bouts each passing moment. I know there is nothing to worry about and you are in the safest possible hands when I am not around, perhaps that doesn’t stop me from thinking about you.

Though you cannot speak yet, when I hear about some signs that you show as the evening approaches to show that you are missing me, it runs chill down my spine 😦 . I constantly fear for your reaction when you would be of age to understand that I had to leave home for long 10 hours right from the time when you could hardly recognize any one around but me.I hope you would understand how difficult it was/is/will be for my fickle heart to stay away from you.

Mumma will see you soon my little chiu chiu…!

by the way…!


By the way – life is what happens to you when you are busy planning other things. Out of the thin air it starts formulating and  universe conspires in your favor if you are keen to go for it. Well this is it for now.. Watch this space for more 😉 🙂

“Sun rahi hoon sudhbudh kho ke
Koi main kahani
Puri kahani hai kya kisi hai pata
Main to kisiki ho ke yeh bhi na jaani
Ruth hai yeh do pal ki ya rahegi sada
Kise hai pata
kise hai pata…………..”

name it what you want…


For the yet another time I am not sure what it is. Why is this uneasy feeling,why this gloom around. I am not sure what mind state it is and why it is here in the first place. Positive words have stopped working for me somehow. Nothing seems in place. I am not able to concentrate on any single thing,finding everything to be just an over head.

I have striven hard to get to work on thing and technology I love, but some how from last couple of days no matter how interesting the work is, I just don’t feeling like doing it. Deadlines are approaching fast, peice of work that I am assigned to is critical, my mind know it all and still it refuses to take it upon. I mean what do we call it? I really cannot afford this state of my mind.And did I mention this state is not limited to the work only.

To add some colors to the monotonous life,just to have some breathing space, feel the joy of creativity, keep up the learning attitude,I have joined guitar classes. Borrowed the guitar from a friend so that I can keep practicing beyond the class hours. I was loving it to the core. Yes sadly I should say “I was”(figures crossed, I wish to write it as “I am loving it” really soon) and its same story here. I simply don’t feel like touching those strings. There is such a long plan already made as to list of songs to be learned,buying my very own guitar and playing some complete track unplugged, and let you wonderful reader hear it and look for your feed back. Where is the urge gone? I want it back,I really want it back.

Same story continues with reading. Its been time that used to peep at the pass by book stalls to pick up the one or two just in the time traffic single goes green. This was the desperation to read irrespective of the hectic schedule. And now I am just planning to buy a new book to read since last 15 days. Yes,just “PLANS”. It was never been the case that I didn’t know what is the next book to read,but now I really don’t know,if I am to pick up, what should it be. I feel envy to see my roomy lost over a book. Where is that “ME”. I am just so missing my own self.

It was me who was scolded every now and then because of the plugged ear phones, and yes you people got it right, I don’t even feel like listening songs too. My beloved iPod, who was the companion of night till I fall a sleep remain in the bag pocket.

Where I am heading with this all. Ahhh I don’t know what I  need. No don’t suggest me to take a break I already had it. Had really good time with all my cousin  brothers and sisters. Probably I just need some time with myself.I need the ME time so that I can re-organize myself and priorities things on mind. Is it that I am trying to think and do so many things at a time that is causing this chaos? I need to figure this out. Till then,if there is something that you people can suggest,please do. Suggestions are kindheartedly looked forward to.

Hope to you meet you people on a positive note next time we meet. Till then,

Its me,

Yours truly

Rooh ka banjara re parinda
Chhad gaya dil ka re gharonda
Chhad gaya dil ka re gharonda todke
Re gharonda todke, gaya chhodke

(Its the free spirit (in me) that is soaring, flying out like a bird, escaping from my heart, which (once) used to be its abode…..breaking the shackles that held it within….(as we talk), the spirit is away on a wing and a prayer, having bolted from its own (constraining) home.)
Je naina karun band band
Beh jaye boond boond
Tadpaye re, kyun sunaye geet malhar de

(Every time  I close my eyes, the river (of tears) begins to drizzle (down)…..Anguish and misery are my (constant) company, even as the song (and sounds) of rain(s) have started their slow dance.)

sip of it – the motivation


“You expected to be sad in the fall.

Part of you died each year when the leaves fell from the trees and their branches were bare against the wind and the cold winter y night.

But you know there would always be the spring, as you knew the river would flow again after it was frozen…” Ernest  Hemingway

que sera sera…..


Don’t have anything special to write about. Just felt like scribbling something. Long break from the routine is something I was looking for and I am having it. Its yet another day I’ll be back to pavilion with many things to think about really seriously (Mom is source for food for thoughts this time…) Though many of these things make me hold my breath at times, this time it is like “Que Sera Sera….” I am no more worried, nor sure out of what I am ready take upon whatever time and life has to offer…

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